Why Your Friends Would Rather Go To Target Than Buy From You: Part 2


Let's talk about guilt and struggling to say no, and Target.

These are two factors that come into play for women who are generally compassionate and don't want to hurt their friends feelings by saying "no" to hosting a party or buying a product. She is so afraid that her friend will be hurt or be disappointed if she tells her that she is simply not interested, doesn't have time, or maybe doesn't even like the product. But because she doesn't want to offend, disappoint or cause negative waves, she says "yes".

Now take this scenario and multiply it many times over. What do you have? You have a woman who is always saying "yes" when she wants or needs to say "no". A high level of anxiety can be developed, and she may find herself not talking to certain individuals for fear that they are going to ask her to do something related to sales. What's worse is that usually this woman doesn't have the courage to tell her friend the truth, so her friend unknowingly is causing her to experience these negative feelings and isn't being told the truth. This happens more often than we want to admit.

Or maybe you have a woman who is excited about opening her home to her friends to host a party for a product she loves, or invests her time in a Facebook party online. She puts herself out there, only to find that nobody shows up and nobody buys. This then turns into feelings of guilt that the representative wasted her time, and that her own time was wasted. Such a yucky cycle! What was supposed to be a fun, encouraging night with girlfriends turned into regret, a clean house and brownies. ( at least there are brownies!)

Where there are people, there will be emotions.
Where there are people, there will be needs.
Where  there are people, there will at some point be conflict.
Where there are people, there will be misunderstanding. 


Now, let's talk about Target.

Oh, how I love Target. I know that may be a controversial statement to make in the eyes of some, but I love that red bulls eye experience.

I can get coffee from a stranger at Starbucks, and never have to see them again, and I get to wander the aisles with absolutely NO pressure as to what brand I buy. The only human connection that I need to make is to say "excuse me" if I'm coming around the corner and almost bump carts with someone, or the shallow small talk or no talk with the cashier. And that is it. 

It goes without saying that the life of the average American woman is jam packed FULL, which often produces stress, anxiety and feelings of "if life throws me one more curve ball, I'm going to crawl up into a fetal position and never stand on two legs again!". So who wouldn't want the red bulls eye experience next to the emotion packed, need driven online sales world? Hmm?

There is something about anonymity in a shopping experience. Sometimes you want to shop with your girlfriends, and sometimes you just want to be by yourself among strangers, immersed in your thoughts and taking however long you need to make a decision. There is no pressure, except if it's a really good sale that is ending soon, or your toddler has pooped or is screaming for a cake pop, despite the fact that she just had one.

And then there is the issue of cost. We all place value on things in certain areas and for different reasons. There will be some women who want to buy cheap jewelry that breaks, and drop big money on clothes, and there are some women who spend a lot of money on nice jewelry, but wouldn't pay more than $10 for a shirt. Likewise there are some months where a woman can't afford $40 mascara, so they go by the $10 mascara at the drug store when she is picking up her medicine and feminine supplies. You get the picture.

You see, it's not that your friend doesn't want to support you and see you succeed. In fact, she wants to support all her friends and see them succeed, but the reality is that she can't do that financially, not for everyone at least. Sure she can share your link, or wear your product or do something to help her friend that doesn't require purchasing anything, but honestly it just becomes something else needed of her. Something else that she needs to do.

Right? Do you hear me?

A dear friend ( she will go unnamed) said something to me that has really stuck with me. At the time I was approaching her to do a style class, and she said "Sarah, I really want to, I do. I love the jewelry. But I have so many friends that are asking me to host an event, whether it be in my home or online, and I just can't do it for everyone, so I'm not going to do it at all."

I honestly couldn't blame her. I understood and respected her decision, and definitely was grateful to receive such honest insight.

Am I saying that these scenarios are always the case? Absolutely not. Am I communicating that direct sales is evil and should disappear? Most certainly not. Am I saying that the issues that I am putting forward in this topic are real and happening? Absolutely.

Stay tune for the conclusion in part 3, where I will discuss how every direct sales lady can handle these issues in their business and life, and why every woman needs at least one friend who owns her own business.






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