Lack


As Christians, we have the promise and the hope that Jesus is all that we need. In the "I centered" world of pain, bitterness, materialism, disease and hardship, we seek refuge in the pages of His love letter to us; the Bible. We turn to fellow believers for encouragement and hope, and we fill the pews of churches all across the world in an effort to give and receive that which God has blessed us with.
As of late, I've had a very rude spiritual awakening. I've realized that God has allowed me to walk through a season in which I am facing my greatest fear: the fear of not having enough; the fear of "lack". I've been learning that the very thing we fear is the very thing that God will use to show us how infinitely greater He is. That if we take stock and comfort in having "enough" in this world, we are fooling ourselves and setting ourselves up for self distruction.

As with previous posts, I take the risk in divulging personal details in my life in an effort to bless, encourage and inspire my readers; this post is no different.

I grew up in a home where there was much "lack". There were many ways in which it didn't lack, so much so, that that which I did not lack wasn't made obvious to me until many, many years later, when I found myself trying to find fulfillment in things other than my relationship with Jesus Christ. It was this empty hole that I wasn't aware of, and as a result, I formed unhealthy coping mechanisms to deal with things in life that were normal to me, but were in fact, not normal. Sometimes I wonder if I'll ever be able to reach that place of truly believing with everything in me, that Jesus is all that I need.


Have you been there?


If you have been there, then you know what a shock it is to the heart to see that what you thought was normal, "o.k." and even "healthy", was all a facade. It is an even greater shock to realize that there was absolutely nothing that you could do about it; that as a child, you were practically helpless, and unable to know what you know now. There used to be a time that I was bitter about this, and very angry. I asked God "why?!", and struggled to trust Him and His provision in my life. I said I trusted God with my whole heart, but the truth was, I trusted Him as my Father, my Shepherd, My Healer, My friend, my Lover and my Teacher, but I did not trust Him as my Provider. Wow. Just seeing those words typed in black and white humbles me, and is threatening to make me bawl in front of all the fellow customers in Caribou Coffee.


If you think about it, why would we trust God in the role of our lives that we didn't experience here on earth? The answer is, in our humanity, we can't. Apart from Him, we simply can't do it. In fact, apart from Him, we are drawn to the very thing that we are trying so hard to avoid; the very thing that we are trying to escape. We can only trust Him to be and do for us what He promises, through HIS strength and HIS power. When we see and accept these kinds of truths, we are humbly drawn into the only healthy co-dependent relationship that exists; our relationship with Jesus Christ. When we acknowledge that we are a bi-product of sin and without His blood, without His grace, without His Holy Spirit actively working in our hearts, we are bound for a life of sin and self distruction, with no hope....no hope at all.


My prayer for you is, that like me, God will clearly reveal to you the specific role that God is in your life that you are flat out rejecting, due to fear and ignorance that is preventing you from acknowledging that truth. Is it the role of Healer? Do you flat out choose to believe that He will not heal you of an emotional, physical, spiritual disease or wound? Or is it the role of Teacher? Do you struggle to believe that God will actually teach you everything you need to know to navigate the life that you have been given? Perhaps it is God's role of being the ultimate Lover in your life. Do you struggle to believe that you are worth loving, that God loves you with an intensity that you can't even begin to fathom? Whatever role it is, may you be humbled to the point where you are flat on your face in tears, that God DOES fulfill that role. May you repent of your sins that only cause guilt, greed, arrogance, pride and ultimately, pain.


May the "lack" that you have experienced in your life serve as a means to turn to the One who, in Him, you will lack absolutely nothing in this world or the next.


"Though my father and mother forsake me, the Lord will receive me. Then the Lord will take care of me."-Psalm 27:10


"But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. "-Matthew 6:33


"For the Lord God is a sun and shield; the Lord bestows favor and honor; no good thing does He withold from those whose walk is blameless."-Psalm 84:11


"...For your Father knows what you need before you ask Him."-Matthew 6:8


"If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today, and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, how much more will He clothe you, O you of little faith!"-Luke 12:28



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